Fulfilled Life #1: Mindset
It is my life’s purpose to help others to realize and achieve their highest potential. Because of this calling, I have spent a good deal of time trying to figure out what it is that motivates people. More importantly than this, what is the underlying factor that makes some people motivated and others not, even when the two different groups have been brought up in similar situations?
A primary underlying driving factor is that of pleasure and pain, gain and loss. People perceive the pain of trying and failing as greater than the pain of never having tried at all. From a different angle, people perceive the pain of failure and loss as greater than the potential gain and benefit that they will receive by trying and succeeding. It is very easy for our brains to see and focus on that which we will lose if we try something. It is much more difficult for our brains to measure and see what it is that we will gain by a big life change.
We can train our brain to be in a state of opportunity seeking. We manifest that which we focus on. If we focus on lack and fear, then that is what we will get. If we focus on love, happiness and abundance, that is what we will get. If we lose our job, that could be perceived as a tremendous loss, or a tremendous opportunity. A predatory animal never worries about it’s food source running away or becoming extinct. Human’s worry about losing their source of income which is an indirect source of their food. If an animal’s food source is no longer, they move on and find a new source. This should be the way of humans as well. Except we can control our perception of the situation. So when the door that is our job closes, hundreds if not, thousands of opportunities open up. You literally have a sea of opportunity due to this new found freedom.
I know what you are thinking, that is nice, but how do I pay rent and get food onto the table. You step up and do what you have to. As Les Brown said “Tell yourself that if it’s hard, I’ll do it hard. I’m unstoppable!” Your inner dialogue is paramount. You must not want to succeed, you must expect to! Les Brown also said that “If you do what is easy, your life will be hard, but if you do what is hard, your life will be easy.” There is pain in life no matter where you go or what you do. If you try to avoid it by staying small and living a life that does not demand all of your greatness, you will still have pain. Why not choose the pain that you receive, because it is your choice and your actions to move along your own path!?
Most people settle into life and let it happen to them. They become the victim. They would rather complain about life then to do something about it. People become complacent, they fall into their comfort zone. In order to be successful one must seek to get out of the comfort zone. We must realize that yes, it is uncomfortable to do such a thing. What is more uncomfortable, getting outside of your comfort zone until it is no longer uncomfortable, or living a cowardice life and sitting on your deathbed full of regret? As Les Brown so properly put it “Greatness is not a destiny, it is a choice.” You must be willing to “fail your way to greatness.” He also says,
“in order to do something that you have never done, you must become someone that you’ve never been.”
You must put in the effort, but also to have the grit in order to stick it out for the long haul. There are countless stories of famous people who were denied hundreds if not thousands of times before becoming icons of a generation. We must learn from these people. The common thread is tenacity and perseverance against all opposition and an expectation, without a single shadow of a doubt that they will succeed.
In conclusion, we do not have control over situations or scenarios outside of our own individual actions. Our primary power over such situations is our interpretation of and thoughts about them. We have the choice around how to act and react. We can judge a situation as good or bad, we can allow ourselves to be happy or sad. We can find the opportunity in a perceived failure. We can become complacent and live a life of mediocrity, or we can choose to step a little bit outside of our comfort zone every day. Life will give us challenges regardless of whether we want them or not. It is our choice to rise up and utilize them to our benefit, for our learning and constant improvement.